Erin’s recent post about social networking sites and technology and kids brought to mind my own opinions on the subject..and BOY do I have opinions on this topic. I started writing a lengthy comment to her post and then thought I’d simply answer the questions that she asked and save my rantings for this post.
Technology is a tool. It is much more complex than a hammer, yet can be as dangerous as an intricate piece of heavy equipment if used with malicious intent.
My opinions are driven by the field of education because it’s what is most familiar to me, what I am passionate about, and what I’ve spent years studying. On a daily basis I argue with school districts as they block Web 2.0 technologies because they’re not deemed ’safe’ for children. I know in part this is driven by funding needs under the Children’s Internet Protection Act (CIPA) which in turn complies with E-rate funding to provide that very same technology that sits on desks in schools. I still am amazed daily when I watch, and listen to how technology is treated in our schools. In many cases it’s treated as a separate subject, “Computers.” You never took a class called, “pencils” or “phones” yet they are tools as well. You learn to use them when the need presents itself. Why do we plunk kids in a class and then force them to learn software (often one particular company’s software-but I’ll not go on THAT rant)?
If I step away from schools and move into homes I’m even more appalled. Especially if I’m forced to watch the spin that mainstream media takes on the entire topic. Every time I read a headline about MySpace being a danger to teens I laugh aloud. Teens abandoned the place in droves as soon as the media gave it hype the first time around. Why? Because concerned parents began creating accounts to keep track of their kids, and adults on MySpace are REALLY not cool. You know what? The adults fell in love with it! Social networking is cool, it’s fun, and people began finding friends that they had lost 10-15 years prior. The average age of the MySpace user isn’t 15, it’s 30-50. In all honesty probably more workplaces than schools should block it because of unproductive behavior. 
And yes, I’m actually going to say this, and those that know me well have heard me say this before. Despite the vast number of Dateline specials about catching online predators, the actual chance of your child getting picked up by an online predator is pretty rare. (It’s also rare for them to be abducted or sexually assaulted by an actual stranger, it’s much more likely to occur from someone they know-but that too is another post) A great article on the topic is Predator Panic .
I really am not a person that is as afraid as the Internet as most. My husband and I both work with technology and education and one of my jobs (before my current one) used to be to teach library/computer classes to elementary students. I did very little ‘teaching’ and a lot more listening to them as they felt their way through software and the net and most of the time taught me things. We did spend A LOT of time talking about how to tell whether information on the Internet was valid and legitimate. They learned that even other kids could make web pages, and they started to question things. Many of them were already using messengers and networking sites at home. Sure, they might be banned in school, but what good did banning them in school do if no one in school took the time to talk to them about how to be safe in using them. We spent a lot of time talking about situations, scenarios, and what to do and I think in the end they were all better off for it and became a group of kids who actually learned to question technology and gave more thought to the people on the other side of the message. I only hope they can extend that message to all forms of media.
My own kids don’t have computers of their own yet. They’re almost 4 and 2. My husband and I imagine we’ll actually be pretty strict about their use. I have a real problem with people tying to impose laws on the entire net and its users when really a stricter set of rules in their own home could do the trick. We plan on having a strict no computer in the bedroom rule, as well as timing their Internet.
I think as a parent we totally have the right to read their email and I commend Erin for doing so as she mentioned in her post. People have a false sense of security on the Internet. It’s really not private at all. I know my employer can read my email and DOES, and knowing that makes a big difference in what I say. Should my kids have the right to privacy? Sure, and they will…they’ll have lots of private moments that I’ll know nothing about, and as they become old enough to enter college then certainly I will not be reading their email. However, they should know that right through high school I can be reading their notes at any time. When they have the ability to talk to anyone in the world and I’m paying the bill, I have the right to read. Plain and simple.
Now I just hope I can hold to it.
Am I afraid of pedophiles and online predators? No. Am I afraid of bullies? Not really. What I am afraid of are my own children. In all honesty it my own kids I don’t trust to keep themselves out of trouble.
After all…they’re my kids….dear God…what would *I* have done with the internet in high school….
